Learn a New Point-of-view

Keywords: perspective, conflict, resolution, disagreement, relationships, getting along, point-of-view, emotions, defensive, argument, mindfulness.

 When we get upset about something, it's important that we identify WHY we are upset and think it through until you are able to put it into words. This way, if we have an opportunity to discuss the problem we will be able to explain it to whoever is interested, which gives us an opportunity to SOLVE our problem. Practice your explanation until you are comfortable with it. Try to leave out any accusations or blame. Focus on relating your past experiences that helped shape your current point-of-view.


A good rule of thumb when you have a problem, is to be able to identify what is needed to counteract the problem. In other words: don't just have a problem. Be willing to work toward a solution. So, don't be so quick to attack the next time you have a disagreement with someone. Listen to their point-of-view and then respectfully tell your point-of-view. A solution will usually present itself in the process.


When we don't have the knowledge and the tools to identify our emotions and communicate them, we attack. It's a self-defense mechanism we use instinctively to protect ourselves. The problem is that when we attack first, we're not giving ourselves a chance to learn another point-of-view. Every new point-of-view we can understand or relate to expands our knowledge base that we can then use to plan, strategize, and assess situations and events better. Attacking someone who disagrees with you only drives them away, and with them, your opportunity to learn something new.


Take a deep breath, open your mind and your ears, and listen to someone who doesn't agree with you once in a while. It'll increase your knowledge and help you build stronger bonds in your relationships with others.